Well, we had some old timey horse rustlin' almost take place today at the barn my wife and I manage. My wife Jennifer has been dealing with a deadbeat border for the last three months, trying to get paid. Last month, she sent the woman, Joan, a letter giving her 30-days notice of eviction as required in the contract. The thirtieth day was yesterday, March 31. We hadn't seen or heard hide nor hair of Joan for all thirty days, but lo and behold the telephone rang at the eleventh hour and it was her. She simply wanted to come in and pay her back board and one-half month advance on the next month in cash, as if that would make us square! Jennifer told her that she was no longer interested in having her as a boarder and that she should come in the next day to have a chat.
It should be said that Jennifer has fallen for this woman's fine Paint gelding, Doc, who she's been exercising since not only has the woman not paid her board or returned a single phone call, she hasn't been out to the barn once to groom or exercise Doc the whole time. Doc is a willing, good mover, and a handsome sucker to boot; he's got beautiful markings, is in good flesh and has one neat blue eye (cool, but also an indication of increased risk of cancer).
So, being wily business folk, we set out to end up owning Doc outright by telling Joan we'd forgive the debt if she just signed the horse over to us. Jennifer printed up an official Bill of Sale and planned to present Joan with it in the morning.
This morning Joan surprised Jennifer by showing up at the designated time. She told Jennifer that she would pay her the money she owed her in cash and then just give (not sell) Doc to a friend who could keep him at his own place. Jennifer started talking to her about the type of place he was going and started to genuinely get a little choked up, hoping he'd be treated right and be happy. Joan told her it was a fine place, getting a little choked up herself. Then, out came the guns.
"You know," Jennifer said, wiping a tear away from her eye, "I'd be willing to forget everything if you sign him over to me."
Now remember, the woman was just giving the horse to a friend. She wasn't going to sell him. So, Jennifer's offer would save her $1200.
"Would you really do that?" the woman asked.
"Sure I would. Doc's happy here. I like him."
The woman paused for a moment, thinking about it, probably wondering how she was going to explain to her friend that she'd stabbed him in the back, and then said, "Alright, let's do it that way."
So, Jennifer went into the office, got the Bill of Sale, had the woman sign it, signed it herself, and had an employee witness it. Jennifer and the woman talked a bit for a minute and the woman left. Done. We had gotten a very fine horse for $1200, a whole lotta headache and more disrespectful treatment than two good people should have to bear.
A couple of hours later, Jennifer hopped into the car and drove out to the airport to visit with one of her sister's that had a three hour layover. Just after they finished having lunch at a restaurant in the airport, Jennifer's cellphone rang.
It was Joan, calling to tell her that she'd changed her mind seein' how the friend that she was going to just give Doc to had told her that he was willing to pay $2500 for him and that they were already there at the barn with a trailer, but they didn't want to do anything without letting her know!
Jennifer told her not to go anywhere before she got back, hugged her sister, ran out of the airport and hopped in the car. That's when she called me and told me the news. She wasn't sure what to think or what to do. She was worried about being a hard **** as the woman has been going through some emotional and family stuff. Maybe she should just take payment and let her remove the horse. She was worried about "karma."
"Screw karma! That woman has been giving us the run around for months and now she's at the barn to steal that horse!" I hollered into the phone. "The horse will be gone by the time you get back and we'll never hear from Joan again. We won't even get paid what she owes us! We've already been burned for 350 bucks by one deadbeat and I don't want to get burned again. Call the police! Tell them to get over there, that there is a woman at the barn with a trailer who officially signed a horse over to us this morning as payment of her outstanding debt and who had now changed her mind and was about to steal our horse."
She hung up with me and called the police, explaining the situation to the 911 operator. The operator told her that they would dispatch an officer.
About ten minutes later, Jennifer's cellphone rang again. It was Joan.
"Jen, did you call the police?"
"Yes, I called the police!"
"Why? You didn't have to do that. I told you we weren't going to do anything without telling you."
"Joan, I don't know anything about you other than that you are at my barn with a trailer telling me that you are taking Doc. I had no choice but to call the police. I'll be there in ten minutes," Jennifer said and hung up the phone.
Ten minutes later, Jennifer pulled around the corner of the drive. The first thing she saw was that Doc had been pulled out of the turnout and that he was grazing in the field on a lead rope being held by a stranger, near the truck and trailer. In addition, there were three patrol cars and cops milling around. Jennifer parked the car, got out and started to walk over to the group of cops. One of them broke away and took a step toward her.
"What did you call us for? You should only call us if there is a problem!"
"There is a problem!" Jennifer excalimed. "That woman is on my property with a horse trailer getting ready to take a horse that she legally signed over to me this morning! She owes me three months worth of board. I took possession of the horse as satisfaction of that debt. Now, she says she's changed her mind and is going to sell the horse to a friend! They already have the horse out of the turnout. Doc loads fine. Do you think they'd still be here if I hadn't called you?"
The cop relaxed and said, "Alright, I guess there is a problem then."
The cops took Jennifer's information and they took Joan's information. Then they told Joan to git, explaining that she'd legally signed the horse over to Jennifer and there was nothing that she could do about it. If the friend wanted the horse so bad, then if she was willing, Jennifer could sell the horse to the friend for $2500. Jennifer said she didn't want to make any decisions on the spot. She told Joan to call her later and that they could talk then.
The horse rustlers slinked off into their truck and drove away, leaving Jennifer, the police and Doc behind.
As the three police cars drove away, one of them pulled up alongside Jennifer and said, "You know, you should have a security gate installed across the drive there so that this can't happen again."
"I probably should."
"Anyway, I'm on patrol all night. I'll swing by five or six times to make sure she doesn't come back."
"Thanks."
"You bet," the policeman said and drove off, leaving Jennifer in possession of her new horse, Doc, nearly rustled.