My Fly Fishing Experience of a few years ago. This occurred after a visit to My Dentist who is a Fly Fishing Advocate.



To The Staff:

Recently it was my pleasure?? to require the good Dr. Carmichellç—´ service. During the ensuing one sided Discussion.
[ How can a patient talk with his jaws forced open and his mouth filled with all types of tools ]
The good Doctor mentioned that Fly Fishing was a remarkably relaxing activity and did much to relieve tension and stress.

Being a person who respects those of competence and education this patient decided to do likewise. It should be noted that the patient had engaged in Fly Fishing some forty odd years ago in a location far away. This was in small streams with many trees so one did not have to flail the line back and forth.

He searched the net looking for the proper gear. After seeing todayç—´ cost of equipment and noting the paucity of the bank account after visiting the Good Doctor he recalled his old gear was still in storage somewhere in the basement. Several hours search turned up the gear at the very back of a pile of heavy boxes filled with useful goods long forgotten and not used in years.

Now begins the tale of Relaxing Fly Fishing


The equipment was placed in order and the small aluminums case still contained an assortment of flies that seemed to be in good condition. All that was missing was the nylon line thingy that one ties to the end of what is called a fly line. So off to the local sporting mans emporium. After some time perusing the stock but not finding the line required a nice store clerk came to assist. Poor fellow didn稚 seem to understand what a Whippet was. Seems he thought it was a dog and suggested a pet store was in order. At this point I realized that my Grandfather had once owned a nice two seat car called Whippet. Now that it was known my terminology was incorrect a description of what I wanted was relayed to the clerk who immediately took me to another aisle and pointed to row upon row off what he called Tippets ? Then to my embarrassment he asked some silly questions about weight, length and if it was to float or sink. Hiding my ignorance I grabbed the closest package, paid and slunk out of the store in disgrace. So far I could detect that there was indeed a change in stress levels. Pulse rate and blood pressure were indeed very elevated.

Now out to the lake for some relaxing fly fishing. With properly assembled gear it was decided to practice the flailing thing from shore. Being rather clumsy I was very happy with the first few short casts. [ I believe this is what it is called when one gets the fly out on the water ] By golly, it was starting to be enjoyable and sooo simple too. Indeed; longer casts were in order and immediately initiated. To my horror a large White pine snaffled my fly and refused to release it. Problems but not big a problem. There was a solution in hand.

I returned from the trailer with ladder and saw in hand. It was now very easy to use the ladder to access the lower tree branches and then climb up to the branch which had taken possession of my fly. Out with the saw and off with the branch. No problem ehh. Well, the branch did not see it that way as it fell on the ladder and hook, branch and ladder all ended up on the ground. I was now Up the tree with no ladder and no one around to assist. Very relaxing, Yes very relaxing.

After some thought it was decided the only way to the ground was to climb down the tree. Having short arms and legs with a midsection that is well developed it was difficult to hold on to the large tree trunk but was possible and the descent started. Yes, tree trunks do get larger toward the bottom resulting in very little grip for my limbs. So little in fact, that my weight became excessive and the descent quickly turned into freefall witch ended with a resounding thump. Ohh did that ever feel nice!!! Yes relaxing!!

Being of a stubborn nature and several mugs [or perhaps more] of hydrating fluid my courage was established, the woundç—´ of falling bandaged and a new plan devised that did not include trees.

The canoe was launched and out far from the trees we went to practice the flailing. Here all went well. My confidence returned. My skill level increased. No fish were caught. It is my understanding that this is normal with the flailing being the real source of relaxation. The sun was shining, nary a breeze rippled the lake surface and the biting insects all remained on shore. The feeling of bliss began to pervade. There was a glimpse of the relaxation potential of fly fishing. Ahh yes, blessed are the ignorant!

The next flailing session was indeed instructive. As the line whipped back and forth the hook part of the fly attached itself to my right ear with a very unpleasant sting. I had caught myself. Fortunately it was catch and release. Unfortunately my ear did not want to oblige. It stubbornly held the hook and refuses to release it. Again a dilemma, endemic to the sport of fly fishing I determined. Now to release myself!

It was finally determined that if the line was cut and a pliers applied to the hook it could hopefully be pulled out just like a tooth but with less pain. Wishful dreaming. The hook only seated itself deeper and the barb worked just as it should. Next it was proposed to cut off the protruding end of the hook and force the remainder of the hook through my ear and out. This sort of worked as the hook suddenly came out my balance was lost, the hook was inadvertently firmly inserted into my bald pate as the canoe was tipping over and myself and sundry gear were deposited in the water. Fortunately the life jacket kept me afloat and with canoe in tow firm land was soon under my feet. What a relaxing sport!

Several hours later, dry clothes, a warm fire and the consumption of large quantities of pain relieving fluids the hook was removed from my pate with what appeared to be only minor difficulties and no pain. Next day the aching head required only a few stitches to close the gash.

Yes, fly fishing is indeed relaxing. All one need do is think of all those deluded souls flailing a line back and forth and peace and contentment pervade as one reaches for another cooling beverage whilst sitting in a comfortable chair.